How Can It Be
by Jellze
Summary: Changes are coming at BAU that no one saw coming, Hotch will soon realise he's not alone. This is not a slash but a HET triangle Hotch/?/Morgan CMfan please reviews! It's good for the soul!
1. Making It Home

A change is coming to the BAU that no one saw coming…

Spoilers: All season 4 (for the sake of this fic pretend Ep19 ''House On Fire'' was before Ep18 ''Omnivore''. Thanks)

Disclaimer : I don't own any of the characters in this fic (except for OCs) or Criminal Minds.

Special thanks: Leigh59 and Goldfish Girl who were my muses for this fic and their great generosity made it possible for me to post this it. You guys ROCK! **ö**

**How Can It Be**

_**Making It Home**_

They're back at the BAU after this terrible and gory ordeal. They were barely able not to drag their feet at the thought of all these victims they couldn't save when the un-sub was staring them in the face all this time. They all had their own way of dealing with it in the flight that brought them back, usually when Garcia was with them Morgan would forgo his headphones for a little more banter than usual and plans for the next few free days coming.

This time he clamed up as much if not more than Hotch, put on his headphone a refusing systematically to acknowledge her, when she pushed he rebuffed her harshly which made Hotch orders him to stand down. Reid ask her to play with him at poker she agreed but no words were heard from her ever since. It worried everyone minus Morgan who was trap in his own self loathing and fear.

Hotch, JJ, Rossi and Garcia were in their offices and the others were at their desk tying up before leaving for the next 4 days. Suddenly JJ came out of her office running bursts into Hotch's office.

"Foyet has escaped!" she says. ''He faked a convulsion and then ran from the infirmary of the prison.''

Hotch's face fell and drained from all blood. The others came in, Reid had one of the files Garcia just pull up for them.

''It says here that Foyet has schematics for every jailhouse in the state.

"He said he'd be more famous than we knew," Derek says dryly. "And looks like he was right! Garcia how come you didn't tell us about this before!" he growls.

JJ took a deep breath; he was getting on her last nerves with his abuse of Pen!

''Morgan…'' she was interrupted by a distraught looking Garcia.

''It's because the information came in a few minutes ago, as quick as I like to be I can't make the system go faster!''

''Really?! Great time for you to be slacking off!''

''Morgan!'' yelled Hotch, with everyone minus Morgan and Garcia.

''What? It didn't take her this much time to find everything about me including an expunged record!'' he stubbornly replied.

''Enough! Stop projecting and keep your thoughts for yourself if they're not rational! You're cutting close to a suspension agent Morgan!''

Morgan left in huff, Hotch turned to Garcia to make it clear he didn't blamed her but was surprise to see she already had left his office. This was too much; he sat down his shoulders hunch forward, his hands rubbing his temples.

''Don't worry Hotch, I'll give her time to herself than hunt her down for some girl time. It'll be ok, they're Morgan and Garcia, just be sure to make him suffer when we get back!'' said Emily before leaving.

''Hotch, maybe you should tell him to take some of his saved time, he could have die and he knows it was only because he fitted in Foyet twisted plan that he didn't. If treats his _**Baby girl**_ this way what will he do to others?'' was Rossi input.

''Rossi's right Hotch, no matter how mad it got he never directed it to Penelope, not even after Chicago, which it seems he has some unresolved issues…'' trailed off JJ.

''I agree, like you said he's projecting what he thinks of himself for letting Foyet have the upper hand on him, that can't be good in the long run. Don't know if you notice but we **need **Garcia for what we do, the rare times she wasn't, it gave us a sizable set back! We can't afford to let him run her off.'' Reid added in.

Hotch sigh.

''Look I already put him in a obligatory psychological follow up, the 4 days we have should be enough for the fog in his mind to dissipate. Like Prentiss said it's Penelope he'll come around. You all just go home and try to rest.''

They left speechless looking at one another. Penelope? This case _**must **_have taken its toll on him!


	2. Making Sure You're OK

_**2. Making sure you're OK**_

Hotch put down the phone, he just finished with Jack. How he missed being able to come home and just watch him sleep or hugging him for the longest time if he was up. It helped him know that he was safe, that he'd live to see another day, that what they did meant there was less monsters out there that can get to his son. People told him that he should choose a cop or fellow alphabet or a women who grew up around it has he's wife cause if a plain civilian woman wasn't a 100% with him, she wouldn't understand and think he chooses work over her. He always thought Hayley was there a 100%. Boy was he wrong he thought with a dry laugh! Something caught his eye.

''Pe… Garcia what are you doing here? Everyone left hours ago!''

''I'm sorry Sir, I was just doing a double check on everything we've got to make sure I didn't miss anything. I don't want another piece of information to set us back like earlier… You on the other hand should go home. You can file paperwork later or at home.'' she said.

Gone was a usually perkiness and mother tone she likes to use with him when he stayed late. He found that he missed it. He was going to kill Morgan!

''You could of done this when we got back! Nothing you find will make us catch him faster, all we have is him making is next mistake which _**he will**_! Morgan is in a bad place right now, but that don't excuse his behavior! He'll come around and back groveling at JJ and Prentiss feet to help him back in your good graces.'' he said trying to lift her up; it's the least he could do.

But he got nothing not even the simplest fakest smile, seems like she was too out of it.

''He's already forgiven I'm working on the 'forgotten' part.''

''You're too good. Come in please sit down.''

He waits for her to close the door and sit. He looks her right in the eye.

''I want you to understand this loud and clear Penelope. In no way do I or anyone from this team, and that includes Morgan when he's sane, think you're not doing a superb job, more than a few times you had the answers before we had the questions. We… I value your part in what we do, I don't think we would have this much success this fast without your expertise.'' he claimed with a firm and sincere voice.

''I… thank you… Sir.'' she choked out.

She looks down and when she looks up again he sees that the Garcia persona is back and so are the walls and for some reasons since he knows her it unnerves him, he wants them down for good! At least around him.

She gets up, goes around his desk and starts to pick up his things and put them in his briefcase! This is the Garcia that usually throws him out of here! A sense of warmth washes over him.

''You Sir, need to go home! You may like to make us believe that you are the stoic fearless leader, but this Goddess knows otherwise. Get some sleep Batman, wake up early and try to bargain a few hours with your son!'' she chirps.

He watches her pile up his files already knowing which he will take home. It amazed him sometimes how much insight she had and didn't seem to know it, even though she dubbed herself the Goddess of all Knowing. This is why on the previous case, in Royal IN (_House On Fire_), he pushed her not only because the case needed it but her insight was valuable and unbiased.

''Come on Charlie Brown! Stop staring and get up!'' she added with a full blown smile.

He stopped her and took her left wrist which caused her to turn and face him still sitting.

''What's wrong?'' she saw a flash of sadness on his face ''Sir it will be OK, she'll let you see him and will get _**him**_ back in prison.''

The saddest smile appears on Hotch's face.

She follows her own aching heart and hugs him, after the first shock he hesitantly wraps his arms around her waist. He's hesitancy made her ask herself if he gets any of these besides the ones of his son. That though made her hold him tighter, his head finds itself buried in her ample bosom. They don't know how they stayed like this but it felt so good after these few days. All the while she kept whispering that it will be OK, they will find him and nobody can hide from them for too long, over and over.


	3. Letting Go

_**3. Letting Go**_

Garcia started to pull back, but Hotch kept her from pulling back completely. It felt like he would fall down to abyss unknown if he let her go. She seemed to understand cause she stayed there and put a her left hand on the side of his face.

''We need to find someone to take care of you, you can't go on this way.'' she said looking down at him.

Their eyes locked, their breaths caught, inch by inch their faces came closer until their lips touched in the softest way. Penelope stiffen a little and tried to pull back again but Aaron followed, stood up and pulled her closer increasing the pressure on her lips his tongue asking for entrance. She gave in and let him in. Her right arm around his neck secured her to him, her left hand left his face to get in his soft short hair. He shivers when she grazes his scalp with her blunt nails. He was drinking her like he hadn't quench his thirst for years, his tongue was trying to memoires every crevices of her sweet mouth.

Hotch's left the small of her back, one went up to lost itself in her silky locks the other finds its ways under her blouse. When his fingers touched her skin, both, in the back of their minds, knew this was wrong on so many levels, she was not the type to brush this of as if nothing happened and he was not he type to take advantage of a situation, even if he did guilt would surely crush him afterward. But neither could or wanted to stop, it been too long since they had this sense of connection through one kiss.

Yes there were a few releases after Hayley but too far between and nothing memorable he was too busy with work and Jack. It had been months since she broke things off with Kevin, who was, let's face it, a distraction to her unhealthy crush on Derek. He never got her or understands why she did give her 400% for this work and her team. He's freaking sixth sense (or his paranoid jealousy, like she called it) telling him there was more to Derek in her heart and mind, which was the cause of huge fights that never seemed to end. Clearly, what they were doing, as great as it felt, was so wrong!

Hotch's fingers grazed her side and went up in their on violation, when they got to her scar she shivered. He caresses it thinking on how close they… he came to loose her. Then it clicked; she too was a reminder that what they do had a purpose if it kept amazing people like her alive. She moaned and that did it for Hotch, any restraints or can't, or shouldn't left in him to drink in everything Penelope; her presence, her sent, her touches, her sounds. He may not be aware of it but Hotch responded to her moan with his own deep growl. She went liquid in his arms. She let his passion wash over her, she never had a man seemingly so roughly desperate about her, she was on untouched territory, she wanted more.

He backed her up to his office couch, they tumbled on it without breaking their lip lock. His hands were everywhere, caressing under her clothes, tugging at them. Breathing became an issue, he left her lips for a quick breathe then connect to her neck. She was trying to take a deep breath but it was cut shot when she felt his lips on her neck tracing a wet path up to under her lobe. She arched her back and he took that opportunity to place himself between her legs and grind his crotch against her pelvis. There were too many clothes; they couldn't get the closeness they craved for.

She helps him get reed of his vest, tie, shirt and undershirt. There he was his chest heaving from his panting looking down at her like there was no other. She started caressing his pecks, used her legs to pull him closer so she could nibble on his adam apple, she tweaks on nipple while she presses on the other with her thumb before circling it with her nail. He groans and buries his face in her hair. He never realized before that he knew her sent, that sent that was slowly driving him crazy combined with her touch. Her hands had found their way to his belt, he stops her when it and his pants are undone. He place her hands above her head and keep it there with one hand, the other unbuttons her blouse. His thumb caresses each patch of skin it finds while going down the blouse. When he tries to open it he feels her stiffening, he looks up at her, her eyes are close.

''Penelope'' he rasps not recognizing his own voice.

She acknowledges him but keeps her eyes close.

''Penelope!'' he says more passionately.

That did it.

''We can stop if you want to, I wont force you" he says softly.

'' No! I… you… I'm…'' she stutters lowering her eyes.

''PENELOPE!'' he growled out. She looks up again startled.

''If you want this I won't let you hide from me!'' he said before dipping down and kiss her for all it was worth leaving her breathless.

''I WANT YOU, please don't hide from me.'' He continued looking into her eyes.

Never breaking contact he lowered her arms and took off her shirt, he strokes her breasts through her bra before taking it off, still looking into her eyes.

She wanted to close her eyes and not see the deception in his eyes but it was like he kept her in a trance. She hold her breath when look at her. She heard him groaned then his hot hands are all over her.

''You're beautiful.'' he whispered before giving her a soul searing kiss.

They made a quick riddance of their lower half, now both feeling every inch of each other but they still wanted more. Hotch lowered his hand to her entrance and teased her lips before his thumb started to drew slow circle around her bundle of nerves. Penelope was now a restless puddle of desire under him, she couldn't form a single thought, she was pulling and pushing him at the same time.

When he inserts a long finger in her, she cried out which he silence with his wanting mouth, using this opportunity to do with his tongue what he was doing now with two fingers. His other hand was caressing, pulling and pinching her breast, from time to time brushing her scar. Penelope was now moving on instinct, if you ask her what was a computer at moment she would of drawn a blank. Her hand encircles his member and strokes him slowly but firmly from base to head, she rubbed the latter with her thumb every time she reached it. It was Hotch's turn to roll on instinct; with every stroke he attacked her mouth with a renewed passion. His fingers found the right spot in her core while his thumb pressed hard on her numb. Penelope let go of him, stiffen and cry out, he pushes himself up, still caressing her and watches her in wonder.

He couldn't wait any longer, he drops a kiss on forehead and enters her. She barely got down from her high when she felt him in all his glory. She knew his was big, but inside her it was a whole other story! He waited to make sure she was OK, she softly raked his back with her blunt nails and bucked her hips hard to entice him. Hotch let go, his hands roaming her luscious curved body, his face buried in her neck biting and soothing with his tongue, hard and fast deep thrust. Both were moaning, groaning not wanting it to end, but Hotch felt it coming.

He position himself to look at her and hit the spot he found earlier, lowered down his hand between them, he pinch hard her already sensitive nub while pinching one of her nipples. That did it for her, she dug her nails in his back hard, bucked, moaned, sobbed, talked gibberish, there were too many sensations; she was going to die! She was clenching so tight around him, he buried his face in her neck, wondering if he was starting a fetish with it, she was still riding the wave when it hit him. He couldn't help himself when he bite down hard her collarbone, his thrusts became frantic, his growls muffled by her collarbone. Their movement became slower, than none existent beside their panting chests. He rolled on his side so he wouldn't crush her, an arm behind his head and the other possessively around her waist and his face yet again buried in her neck. She was stroking his arm, they fell into slumber whispering each other's names.


	4. Making An Exit

_**4. Making An Exit**_

The endless insomniac that was Garcia woke up, maybe 1 or 2 hours later. The delicious numbness of her body made her want to turn into her lover's arms and fall back to sleep. Wait! Lover?! And when did she get home??! She opens her eyes and sees she does have a lover buried in her neck, a pleasurable shiver washes over her. Not now, down girl, bad girl!! She looked around and saw that she was in the BAU, Hotch's office more precisely!!! Which means… and all the images from the last hours came flooding back, she had to bit her lip to prevent a moan. She hold her breath while detaching herself from him, she slide down the floor, started picking up her clothes not bothering to put her underwear now, the faster she leaves the better.

How could she have been so stupid!!?! Her BOSS! Well not her boss but none the less a superior and co-worker! She sees him almost every day! Was she this much desperate for affection!?! And Aaron… she means Hotch, it was just a laps of judgment, he got through so much, he just needed to loose himself for a while, too feel something else than guilt, fear and sadness. She should have been the sane one to stop this! Oh! God! She just remembers that he gave her an out and she didn't take it! She took advantage of the situation and it's the _'advantagee'_ that's making sure she's OK. She needs to disappear for the next few days. They had 4 days right? Thank God she closed down her office before she came to see him!

She was riding the elevator wondering where could she go? Not her place he would go there first and probably Morgan too with his damn sad puppy face… Wait!! Derek!! He will know something is wrong as soon as he sees her and will dig until he finds it!!! What a mess. If she thought she could charm him into trying it out with her, she could forget it now! She sobbed, why was her life so messed up? Since her mother found her step-father she didn't catch a break! Her brothers, her parents death, her time underground (she shudders), when she got arrested, Quantico seemed to be a new turning leaf, she fell back into ''High School Pen'' with unrequited love, than came her shooting, her messed up sham of relationship with Kevin and now THIS!!! Why? God why? She was seriously starting to think that reincarnation was true and that she used to be a cruel, mean _**B I A T C H**_! She was surely paying for it now.

She was out of the building and turned the corner of it to prevent the camera from seeing her. She called her cab; no way they were going to trace her with Esther! When the cab picked her up she gave him the address of Mason Neck State Park. She took her cell again and entered a code to access JJ's and Emily's voicemail.

"Hi! Girlies! I'll be out of town for a few, I'll be out of service too. Be good and there better not be any new bruises of misplaced hair on Morgan's bald head when I get back! Give a big hug and kiss to my little gumdrop Jayje! You lovelies rest and enjoy yourselves, love you!'' trying to sound as cheerful as she can.

She did the same with Reid.

''Hello sweet pea! Miss me already don't you? I just wanted to let you know that I'll be out of town and since I'm not there to drag you out, you have to promise that you will see the light of day or I'll seek the girls on you, you hear? Say hi to your mom, love you genius.''

She left a regular message to Rossi, she still didn't come around with any terms of banter with him he was hard to evaluate. Now comes Morgan, gosh! Forget him! She thought with a little anger, serves him right if he panics, the others will soon tell him any way! Should she leave Aar… Hotch one? What could she say? Short and informal, it will be. Boy she spend to much time watching Star Wars with Reid! She was thinking like Yoda now!

"See you on Friday Bos… Sir, please rest. Bye.''

OK that was done now to call her hopefully savior.

"Speak to the Queen of darkness and risk your faith.'' says a raspy voice at the other end of her cell.

"The Goddess of all that is known is request adobe from your Dark Highness.'' she replies with a smile.

Her cab stops, she pays and goes to sit on a bench near the park.

"Goddy! How have you've been! It's been too long. I heard your team had a very sordid case! Wait! Are you alright? You weren't hurt, were you? I hate when they make us go on the field! Did someone in your team got hurt?..."

"Sugar, sugar! Let me at least answer on of your inquiries! Physically everyone is fine, mentally some or worst than others but overall we'll live another day, QD.'' she missed her friend, she should make an effort to contact her more often!

"Oookay?! I feel like there's more behind it! Talk to me Goddy! And I mean now! Wait you asked for a place to stay! Where are you I'm coming to get you!''

''Mason Neck State Park.''

"I'm already there!''


	5. Making Realizations

**_5. _****_Making Realizations_**

Morgan couldn't sleep; he was plague with nightmares of Foyet actually going through with killing him or killing Garcia with a version of what he said to her earlier as parting words: "This is what you get for slacking of!" Then he would turn around to look at a Morgan who was frozen in place and couldn't even scream his anguish. If he tries to stay awake, but all he can see is his Babygirl broken and betrayed expression as he was venting is own frustration on her. He just can't get away!

He decides to go on a midnight run with Clooney to try to exhaust himself into a dreamless slumber. His path brings him in front of Garcia's building. He only looks at it on the way back. He stops. All the lights where off and Esther was nowhere to be seen. Maybe she went to Prentiss place, the latter was probably plotting his death or at least his beat down. If he knew his Babygirl she probably wasn't there, she was the kind to go lick her wounds alone. God! He couldn't believe he purposely said those things to her! From day one she had his back and make sure he was OK. Now, too encased in his own self loathing that he couldn't see the damage he was doing, she was hurting. Hopefully it didn't send her back into **_Lynch_**'s arms for comfort. Nah! That was his trademark, to forget in some stranger's arms…

Where could she be? She wasn't at her place to avoid him, knowing he might get his senses back, but not ready to forgive him yet. He was sure she called the girls to let them know her whereabouts, but he couldn't call them, they would chew him out without letting him know where she was. Reid might be a possible ally, but if this Goddess knew him as much as he thought, she would only tell the genius she wouldn't be home without any further information so that he wouldn't make Reid squeal it out. Damn! Rossi is out of the question and forget Hotch! After what happened, if he knew something, their fearless leader wouldn't let him close to Garcia if he could prevent it. Damn! Had he made a mess of things! Clooney pulling on his leash trying to go inside the building brings him out of his thought.

"Sorry buddy. Mama's not home, I kind of mess up with her."

Like he understands, the overgrown puppy starts to whine while giving a disapproving look to his master. It could be the fact that said master didn't want to let him go to his "Mama" place also. He follows reluctantly his master.

"I swear sometimes you make it look like that you're hers and not mine!"

The dog barks in what seems to be an approval which made Derek have his first smile since this whole ordeal. When he got home he takes a hot shower then sits down in his dark living room, a beer in hand. Clooney lay at his feet. If he can't go to sleep at least he can try and think of where his girl is. Other than the team and Lynch she didn't have people she trust enough to sleep over and let them see her in pain. This leaves her hacker friends. Didn't one live near by in DC? Bobby? Addie? Wait! Abby! Tomorrow he'll go to her place and browse her phone for the number. Now what can he say to make any of this better, Penelope isn't the kind to forgive with gifts and trinkets. Not for the kind of pain he caused. Saying sorry isn't enough, he made her believe he didn't forgive her for digging into his past, like he felt betrayed. It wasn't the case and there was nothing to forgive, she was trying to save him after much coercing from JJ, from what he was told by Reid. If anything else she was doing her freaking job!

He guessed he was annoyed by the fact that he didn't get to tell her before, that she had to find out this way. He didn't like to be save, he waited too long to be save when he was a kid and he had to learn that only he could achieve that. Since then if he got save one way or another it felt like he failed himself and it was hard to swallow. He was the tackler! How could he let this criminal do that to him! Maybe he should ask Hotch to see someone, if he didn't schedule him already, seems like he got some unresolved issues to deal with. At least this was a start to show Penelope that he was dealing with this and she would be less mad at him. They will be in vacation next month, maybe he could get her to come with him to Chicago, if not he'll stay with her the whole period to make amends and be sure that no hard feelings were left. He fell asleep with a smile as his head was filled with dreams of his Babygirl finally showing him a good morning.

************************************************************************

Abigail Sciuto stops her car in front of Mason Neck State Park, she doesn't have to wait long for her friend to come into view. She looks like the world times two was on her shoulders. Her friend gets in, she doesn't say a word to her and just crank up one of her _H.I.M._ CDs knowing it was one of her friend's favorite. They could talk when they get home. Garcia could have cried as Abby starts driving and respect her need to stay quiet. Did she say she missed her? She knows she will be grill at her place but she still had time to herself. She let out a couple of sarcastic chuckles when a few songs made think of her own predicament.

**_HOTCH (Wicked Game)_**

_The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.  
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.  
I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you._

No, I don't want to fall in love (This world is only gonna break your heart)  
No, I don't want to fall in love (This world is only gonna break your heart)  
With you (This world is only gonna break your heart)

_  
What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way._

**_DEREK_****_ (Your Sweet Six Six Six)_**

_There are things you should know  
And the distance between us seems to grow  
But you're holding on strong  
And, oh, how hard it is to let go, oh, so hard to let go_

I'm waiting for your call and I'm ready to take your  
Six six six in my heart  
And I'm longing for your touch and I welcome your sweet  
Six six six in my heart (oh, my heart)

I'm losing my faith in you

What a mess, maybe she should just transfer somewhere far, far away. Every time she heard it Abby looked at her with an arched eyebrow. This seems to be a bigger deal then she first thought! Luckily she just stocked her freezer with iced goodies and her bar some Latin friends!


	6. Making Plans

**_6. _****_Making Plans_**

An incessant beep woke him up, he was cold and he felt like something was missing. He blinked once, twice, thrice. What was he doing in his office? He turned on his stomach. Naked! His eyes snapped open and he sat in quick move. What..? Than it came back, the case… Penelope. He suppresses the shivers of pleasure that this name and the images in his head conjure. PENELOPE! He gets up and dresses quickly. Where was she, in her office? If he knew her, less than likely and forget her place! He should have known she would freak out when this was over. What kind of profiler was he?

He should have kept her trap under him instead of worrying that he might crush her! Wait?! What was that! Focus Hotchner! Surely she wasn't with any of the girls; she wasn't ready to be grilled by them on why she was hiding at either place. Morgan? An uneasy feeling came over and his own growl startles him. She wouldn't be there after what that idiot said to her. Right? For some reason he couldn't stand the thought of it. It would be too awkward to be with Reid and even more Rossi after this. So where was she? The beeping of his blackberry brought him back. He had a feeling that maybe it was his answer and he might not like it one bit. He picks it up and saw that he had a voicemail. How come the ring didn't wake him up but the beep did? He dials in and waits.

**_"See you on Friday Bos… Sir, please rest. Bye.''_**

Damn it! It was worse than he thought! How could he do such a thing to her, she was already dealing with the fall outs of **_Lynch_** and the attitude of that moron Morgan! What was he going to do, he had to talk to her and make sure she was OK before they got back! Think Hotchner, think! He would ask around but he didn't want to raise suspicions before he could clearly know what the hell was going on between them! Even if he finds her, what would he tell her? Sorry hope we can stay friends? Or sorry we made a mistake let stay professional about it? No! No! No! Damn it!! He has to calm down! He needs… he wants… her…

He sighs and passes his hands in his hair. Was it true? Yes, he have to admit that sometimes he stayed purposely behind in hopes she'd seek him out, if she didn't he would seek her out. He thought it was an unspoken agreement, it comfort them both in a way when a case affected them more than another. If he was being honest with himself, it gave him a sense of glee (yes he said it!) when she would turn down Morgan and stayed behind for him. For some unknown reason since the last New Year Eve(1) he started to look at her differently. When he went and looked for knowing she'd be working instead of going home and refusing to go to the party the team was attending. Looking back at it, he was borderline voyeur that day, lurking in a corner observing her, until Rossi called to him. It seems like the cases they got this year kept bringing them closer; New York's bombing(2), La Plata's sect galore(3) where they almost lost Prentiss and Reid, Phoenix's cops' killing(4) is when he realize that she valued him as a friend and did care for him. He, himself, made an effort to let her now that he too valued her when they were in Atlanta for that Don Juan serial killer (52 Pickup). He did believe that she couldn't fall for the "Bad boy/jerk persona''. They started those "end-case chat" somehow.

_(A/N: If you're a little confuse, before you go on, you might want to read the next fics wrote by two marvelous authors, they inspired me for this fic. **Leigh59**'s : No Member Is Better Than The Next(1) and **Goldfish Girl**'s : I Watched(2), The Price We Pay(3), Mama Bear(4). The rest of the fic, if you watch the show, you'll get it **^_^**)_

Since Emily came to BAU he always thought he had an affinity with her, and he still thinks so, but Penelope warmed her way in between, not that he was complaining, especially not now! Although if he was in the same predicament with Prentiss they would be able to talk through it, she would have been the one to hunt him down, he thought with a dry chuckle. All this musing was getting him nowhere. He should take her advice and go rest. Bargain a few hours with Jack. Then the hunt for Penelope Garcia was on!


	7. Making BIG Talks

**Making BIG talks**

Hotch was standing in front of Garcia's building, trying not to look at the stares where she almost die on him… them, not sure if he should get in. Yes, he knew she wasn't there, the plan was to get inside her flat for clues to where she might be. Even though she gave him a key since the Battle debacle he never thought he would had to use it, especially with Morgan or Lynch around. He felt like he was going to invade her privacy when all she wanted was space, but he also feared the more space he let her have the less chance he would have to be hear out. So almost against his will he climbed the stares and went in.

Her place hadn't changed much, though it seems like there were less colors. That made him frown, since Lynch he felt like she was changing and even withdrawing a little, he thought he was just paranoid but seeing her place now maybe he wasn't far off. In needed to stop musing every second! A quick look around before he had to go pick up Jack. As he took a step towards her desk he heard the key in her lock! Damn he wasn't ready yet! It was still all jumble in hi head, he just wanted to make sure he could find when he was sure of exactly he wanted them to be! Well no moment like the present! He set face blank and turn around to be met with the shock one of none other than Derek Morgan…

* * *

Abby woke up with the smell of coffee and pancakes, with any chance blueberry pancakes. She dragged her feet to her kitchen to be met by her favourite cup. She drank more than half of it before she looked up and smile.

"QD I swear you're worst than Reid and me combine!" Garcia laughed.

"Awww! Thank you Goddy! Hmmm! It's been a while since my kitchen smelt that delicious!" she replied while refilling her cup and sitting in front of the plate Garcia made for her.

"Just a little token for her Highness and Her generosity."

They ate in a comfortable silence listening to the news radio.

"I still don't know from what or should I say who I saved you from." She said looking her right in the eye when they were finished.

Between the ice cream, the rum, the movies and her fits of sobs, she hadn't tell Abby what was the problem and she could see the concern and worry on her face. She was surprise Tony wasn't already knocking down the door to demand the name and address of who he should kick the ass! She should let Abby know she what was going before she start speed dialling an army.

"Promise you won't call Tony or anyone else and it's NOT negotiable!"

"Goddy you know I can't keep that promise…"

"You can and you will or I'll play dirty and send a little birdie sing THINGS to Tony!"

"That was more than dirty and unnecessary!" she pouted shaking her dark head.

"Put that lip back in, I told you not negotiable." She glared until her friend took her lip back and sigh in defeat.

"Okay, but I want full immunity when everything is out in the open! Cause seeing how serious and broken you're about what's bothering you it can only be a matter of time!"

"Granted! I'll tell them I threaten to delete you and that I was serious about it! I'm sorry." Garcia step forward and hugged her friend with all her might.

"Hey! It's okay, Goddy… Pen" but only a sob came back as a response.

* * *

"Hotch?! What are you doing here!?" Morgan exclaim after the shock wore out and panic and suspicion flood in.

"I could ask you the same." was the ever stoic reply.

Which strangely comfort Morgan a little, if something had happened to Penelope he new that Hotch wouldn't have been so calm about it. But that raise the question of why else would he be there?

"Avoiding the question by another one? Weren't we trained better than that?" came the defensive reply of Morgan.

"I'm not avoiding anything, though I could point out you just did the same. Again Morgan, why are you here since I know you weren't invited?" he could feel the edge in his voice and maybe… jealousy… where the hell did that come from?

"OK, I deserved that, don't bite my head off! I just wanted to see if she wasn't pulling the stunt of pretending not to be here." he lied, why was he lying to Hotch? Oh! Probably cause he didn't want to look like the stalker they put away by telling he was going to tear the loft until he found Abby's number…

"Right, well she's not here and won't be back until Monday. I suggest you leave her in peace until then."

Until HE talked to her first, he would use all the leverage he had so that Morgan wouldn't pull the rug from under his feet! OK he was starting to worry about the possessive thoughts he was having when he didn't even know what he was going to do and where she stood.

"Hotch… "

"I don't want or care to hear it Morgan you were out of line! On Monday I want the psychiatrist to give me a call letting me know that you sign up for at least 10 sessions after which she will decide if you need more and it's not up for discussion." Hotch cut him off his voice getting angrier by the minute.

"Okay." Morgan quietly agreed.

That caught Hotch by surprise. He thought he would have to pull rank or worst suspend him until he got a clean bill. He was relieve that at least this went well, it means Morgan was ready to face his demons and that he was probably going to ask for help. He felt pride surge through him. His tone softened.

"Good, I hope you know we're here for you."

"Maybe not all of you… after last night." He said a little bitterly.

"Morgan, it's not because you're a complete jackass that we'll lose faith in you and abandon you. You know she'll come around and maybe faster now that she sees that you're getting the help you need."

"Yeah, maybe. Thanks Hotch." he whispered, he turned around to leave but backtracked. "You have yet to tell me what YOU'RE doing here?"

Damn! He almost got away with it!

* * *

Abby had dragged her to the plush couch in the living room without letting go of her.

"Pen you have to talk about it! You're scaring me I'm this close to call Tony and not caring if you tell him about me if it gets you to talk!"

"No!... I… he… we didn't mean to… I'M going to helllllll!"

"It's alright Goddy, you know I'll save you or at least come with you so you wouldn't be alone! Come on dry your tear and tell your Queen how can she help?"

"I… I… slept with him!!!" she hiccupped.

"Who? Please tell me it's you're chocolate Adonis we're talking about!! That's good right he finally noticed you?"

This brought a new fresh wave of tears.

"Ooookayyyy, it's not him I know it can't be Loser Lynch. OMG! No! The fearless leader!" she all but screamed.

Garcia's head shut up.

"How… how…"

"Pen lately you talk about him more you did Morgan or Lynch. At first I thought I should ask you about your feelings but since you were still hung up about Morgan I thought you were just really, really worried about him like you're about your little genius, glad to see my instinct were right!"

"Don't you see how wrong this is?! I just got out of this crazy relationship hoping to seduce Morgan and even if Hotch was at all over his ex-wife there is Emily they're both my friends how could have done something this despicable!" she cried baling her eyes out.

"There, there, it's not that dramatic if you love him, they will understand at some point if they're really you're friends. Does he share you feelings? Please tell me he does before I do call Tony!"

"I don't know what my feelings are… " she guiltily said looking at her hands.

"Pen... what aren't you telling me?"

"It was kind of a spur of a moment thing…" she whispered embarrassed and feeling herself getting red by the minute.

"Right, then what?"

"I kind of hightailed out of there before he woke up…?"

"No, no, no, no, no, no! You didn't do that to him!? What were you thinking; if he's anything you told me he must be worried sick by now! And haven't seen you picked up the phone since we got here, did you call him at least?"

"Ilefthimamessage… "

"Slow your rolls I didn't understand a word!"

"I left a message saying that I will see him Monday."

"Okay, this is getting better and better! How would you feel if he pull that stunt on you?"

"I know I'm a terrible person! I deserve to be alone!" she cried.

"Don't cry, I'll help you fix this. Look I've got to go to work, I'll try to leave early and ask for the next day off."

"You're the best!" Garcia said hugging her friend.

"Well don't you forget it! But it comes with a price…"

Garcia looked anxiously at her friend.

"You take this time alone to decide if give it a go with your fearless leader or resume your plan to woo Morgan then we'll take it from there, okay?"

"You're right, can run forever. Go my Queen, be beautiful and powerful this Goddess needs to meditate!"

* * *

"P… Garcia told me she was going away and I was just making sure everything was okay considering Lynch." did he really come up with that crap pulling an innocent in it? Well not so innocent but he was making himself useful for once.

"Did something else happen?" he said getting worried.

Great Aaron, make him go beat up Lynch for no reason what so ever! He was about to smooth it out when they heard the key in the lock. Oh! No! Bad timing Penelope! Please be the girls, please be the girls!

Morgan turned around, missing the apprehension in Hotch's face, with a smile on his face. He wouldn't have to hunt her down after all and Hotch will back him up on the fact that he was really seeking help.

But thing is it wasn't everyone favourite sunshine… it was Kevin Lynch.

God save his soul…


End file.
